Lately, our society has been moving in a dangerous psychological direction.We are fixated on a mental state called victimization, which steals free thinking and pushes people to believe that life is fraught with hopelessness and despair. Yes, some people are real victims, but the percentage is small compared to the numbers who feel they are being victimized. The mind-set of victimization is dangerous not only because it is socially acceptable, but also has become socially pervasive in our communities. It is a crippling state of mind as it promotes excuses for unhappiness, failure and misery. If you bring this thief of life to a conscious state of mind, you can avoid the pitfalls that arrive from this line of thinking.
From years of reading books on success, happiness, relationships, etc., one point is shared by all. You are the creator of your life…PERIOD! Your thoughts are the blueprint of your life. First in the mind then in reality
is how life actually works. The people in the world who have created wonderful, successful, happy lives have done so by taking full responsibility for their lives and actions. This is the first step to living a fearless life. One
author said this: “It is better for you to take responsibility for life as it is, instead of blaming others for your circumstances, for your predicament. As your eyes open, you’ll see that your state of health, happiness, and every circumstance of your life has been in large part, arranged by you consciously or subconsciously.” This is a rough concept to grasp but if you do, it will unlock the chains that hold you back from your dreams. An excellent example of fearless living is the story of Nelson Mandela, wrongly imprisoned in South Africa for his political views. He was beaten
and jailed for twenty-six years. Mr. Mandela was a victim in every sense and could have used his predicament to fuel anger and revenge. He refused to become a victim and used these events to motivate himself and his fellow compatriots to push for national equality. He eventually became President of South Africa and changed the world. It is the mental state of victimization that cripples a person. It is a mental state of excuses and the price is one you can’t afford to pay.
The price for being a victim or staying a victim is huge. Once you accept this mindset for yourself, you give yourself an out. We must take responsibility for all phases of our lives. Accountability goes back to the reflection in the mirror. If your life is not where you want it to be, it is your doing. This is true for the people who are actual
victims as well. The old adage that comes to mind is; “It is not what happens in life that is important, but how you handle it.” Victim or not, it is the mental state of victimization that will do damage for the rest of your life. We need to be careful as our society condones this state. Turn on the television and listen to the commercials from the lawyers. Has anyone hurt you? Did you eat fast food and know that fatty foods can make you fat? Comedian Lewis Black said, “You mean you didn't know fat, fried in fat, makes you fat?". Dr. Wayne Dyer tells a story of an author who was imprisoned in a Nazi concentration camp. He was beaten and tortured but he would not hate his captors. I will paraphrase his following comments, “You can beat me, crush my bones but you can’t control my mind. I will never give you the power to make me hate. I am not a hateful man. My mind belongs to me.” We control our own lives and we always have a choice in the way we choose to live our lives.
There is another part of victimization that is dangerous. People get use to being one. The attention that is given to them, the ability to avoid responsibility for career, marriage, friendships, is addicting. I have also observed that some people actually try to become victims. Perhaps we all have played this card at times. Living a life of victimization or living as a victim is senseless. A victim is always looking for a savior to turn his or her life around. This personality type will go through many relationships to try and find the perfect person to fill a void in their lives. It is a fruitless pursuit and the lives of these individuals are filled with sorrow, loneliness, regret and pain. Friendships don’t last, careers fail and in their minds it is never their fault. The real reason being, no one wants to be around a perpetual victim. The price people pay to be a victim is beyond comprehension. This is a mental state that must be avoided at all times and at all costs.
Living a fearless life is a life of freedom. It starts by accepting who you are and all
your imperfections. Accept yourself as you are and do something with your life. Colin Cowherd is a sports radio host on ESPN. He has advice about life that I believe is priceless. He said, “Own your baggage, and be productive. Don’t avoid it, run from it or deny it. Own it!” He is telling us not to be a victim. When you hate something or someone you give a part of yourself away. Never let your past, a person or hate steal your life, for that which you hate will always be your master. Victimization is a thief of life and we must rid ourselves of this state of mind and take responsibility of our lives. Or lives are what we make them and only we can change them. It is time to live fearlessly.